Spray tan...not so bad.

I wanted a spray tan for vacation because my legs reflect light, they really do.  I looked it up online and that is good and bad, there are some real horror stories out there!  Anyway, here are the results.  Up close I freak out, because I have NEVER been tan, but in pictures, which is what I wanted it for, it doesn't look too bad!

10% gone!!!!!

I was 209 at my weight watchers weigh in yesterday which was only .2 pounds from my 10% goal so I weighed myself this morning and I was 208.6!!!  So I have officially lost 10% of my body weight!

I consider this a huge goal, because losing 10% of your body weight can lower cholesterol, lower blood pressure, decrease change of diabetes, and improve many other aspects of your health.

Not only that, but I'm only 1.6 pounds away from my 207 goal for Disney and I have no doubt I will do that by the end of the week.  I am also excited to see if Nick's family notices my 25 pound weight loss.  Will it make a difference???  I know it does in my face, I barely have a double chin now when I smile!  Woooo!  But the rest of my body it's questionable.  I've been taking measurements and I have lost some around my hips, waist, and bust, but I find my arms and thighs hard to measure in the same place so I don't have a change there but I'm not sure if that's accurate or not.

Success!!!

Had my weigh in, down to 209.  I checked the scale twice.  I about had a heart attack.  I was hoping for 210 something but 209!!!!  Not eating wings from Buffalo Wild Wings last night was the right choice for me!!!   No problem I will be 207 by Disney.  I have a week to lose two pounds.  If I keep this will power I will see under 200 in no time!   Well....vacation may interrupt it but we'll see!

Update

Down to 211.2.   My Weight Watchers weigh in is tomorrow though so hopefully I can get down to the 210 range by then.  That gives me one week to lose 3 pounds before vacation to meet my goal of 207.  I know I can do it, because if I get down to 210 that means I lost three pounds this week and I even struggled mid-week after eating pizza.

I went shopping the other night for vacation clothes and that was difficult.  Shirts usually aren't too bad for me, but I went to four different stores (Kohls, Gordmans, Dress Barn, Old Navy) and didn't find anything.  Some of that was due to a trend in crappy thin fabric, some size, and lastly, giant armholes in tank tops.  I didn't want to have to heavily alter a tank top that was $20 you know?  I had already been to Wal-Mart, Target, and Maurices but hadn't found anything either.

Last night I made a trip to Wal-Mart and saw that there was a Cato by it.  I had forgotten about this store and they have a half hour until close but I thought I'd try it.  Found two shirts, tried on a few more that I could have done but one had ruffles and rhinestones and the other had clear sequins and Nick doesn't like fussy fashion so I opted out because I thought I might feel silly.  I did have to fix the armholes on one of them but it was very simple and quick so no biggie.

Anyway, I can't wait to show you guys pictures from the trip and it shouldn't be too long that I'm showing you pics of 202!  Well, I might gain in Disney but I'm not going to follow WW while I'm there.  It's vacation.  You shouldn't worry about that stuff on Vacation.

212!!!!

So, another good day of eating and I made it!  212!  Just five more pounds to my goal for Disney and if I behave I know it will happen!  I personally don't see too much of a difference from 222 to 212 by my clothes do fit better and my measurements have gone down.  Well the ones that I've been able to log!  Lol.

222 on the left, 212 on the right 

Again, 222 on Left, 212 on right.

Like I said, physically it's hard to see a difference, I tried taking the pictures at the same angle and whatnot but I clearly didn't do a great job!  Lol.

Anyway, see you again at 202!!!!

I did it!!!!

So, I'm finally past 214.2  Which is what the scale said ALL weekend.  Yesterday I was a little more strict on myself so it finally moved down!  I didn't eat any of the weekly points (which seem to be more to maintain weight) and I saved a few of my daily points.  And the scale said....212.8 this morning!!!!!  Woooooo!!!

I'm not going to post any new pictures today, because it's not quite 20 pounds lost yet, so I'll hopefully get to take those tomorrow.  If I'm at 212.2 or something I'll still do them.  So look for those tomorrow!

I can't wait to see where I'll be at in two weeks when we go to Disney World if I stay on track.  207 here I come!  I think I can do it!

Oh, and the other day I made a yummy cake using a spice cake mix, a 15 oz can of pumpkin, 1/2 a  cup water, and two eggs.  Put in a 13x9 pan and cut into 15 pieces it's only 3 points a piece.  I did add some cream cheese frosting which is horrible (not tasting-wise though!) and makes it about a 7 point treat but sometimes it's worth it if I still stay within points.

Someone also told me that if you add pumpkin to just a chocolate mix and no water or anything it tastes like brownies so that's on the list next!

Time to start exercising!

The first few days of Weight Watchers I always loose like crazy, well, today I was down .2 pounds.  So, while I'm not complaining that I'm back to 214.2, I need to do some more to start losing faster before Disney!  7 pounds to go before my goal and 19 days to do it!  It CAN and will happen!

Plus, my hip/piriformis muscle is really starting to bother me again and quite honestly walking and stretches are what makes it go away, so no point in living in pain right?

It's not worth being miserable every day, just for five seconds of taste!

And that is what I have decided.  Weight Watchers is going very well.  I am back down to 214.4. Yes I am on the scale every day but that is for a confidence boost and to assure I'm doing things to help myself to the best I can.

I'm eating breakfast every day, and drinking 64 oz of water.  I am also eating all the points I'm supposed to but I am tracking everything very closely.  No guessing "about how many points".

I have ate at Outback and enjoyed it, and I even at Taco Johns yesterday.  Did I eat two softshells and a large ole?  No.  I had one softshell and a small potato ole. And I took small bites and actually enjoyed it.

And tomorrow when I step on the scale, I will be down again.  Because I can do this, because I want to do this, and because food is not more important than how I feel about how I look!

It certainly does work.

My first week of weight watchers I'm always surprised at how quickly the weight falls off.  I started back up at 218.8 and am down to 215.4 after three days.  I know it won't continue to stay this way but it's a relief to at least see weight starting to fall off and not pack on.  I'm hoping to get down to 212 soon so I can take some new pictures.  I don't think there will be much of a change in how my body looks just yet, but I want to take pictures for every 10 pounds lost because I saw someone else do it and when you you start getting skinny it's awesome to see how much 10 pounds makes a difference.

Anyway, so happy that it's dropping off, wondering when that will stop a little, and hoping I don't hit any bumps too soon!  207 before Disney here I come!  (Why I picked 207 I don't know.  I wanted to be under 200 but felt that was unreachable in two months when we realized we were going to Disney.  With WW in 20 days it might not be so unobtainable but I don't want to fail and small goals are good.

Success!

After two days on Weight Watchers I have already lost 2.6 pounds!  The plus side to this is that I even ate at Outback (I checked points of everything first), and was never hungry!

I drank lots of water, and ate all my points, so I wasn't starving myself.  I don't know how WW does it, but it does!  C'mon Disney!  I'm getting ready!  21 more days!

Back on Weight Watchers....

After admitting my major fail, and then stepping on the scale to see I had gained almost two more pounds....I joined weight watchers again.  I know it works.  I know it's hard to stick to for myself, but I know it works.  And it typically works pretty fast for me I just can't go past two weeks.  I know it'll be a struggle, but I work now so I can buy food I need, and Mr. Wiggles (my future Pugs name) is total motivation.

Wish me luck.  I started yesterday so we'll see how it goes and I'll keep you updated!

Fessing Up

So this past week, I've done very bad.  I haven't done a thing to loose weight and I've done everything to gain.  I've ate fast food several days in a row, and yesterday ate it twice.  I go there telling myself all the way how horrible it is for me, but I can't stop myself.

So I told Nick.  And I cried. And he was supportive.  He told me he didn't know what to do to help me but he loved me very much and wanted a long life with me and didn't want that cut short.  And then a few minutes later said that if I get down to 182 (which is not my goal but 30 pounds)  he will buy me a pug.  That's right, he'll get me a dog.

So, I printed out this a few pug pictures, one on the fridge and one for the dashboard of my car, so I can remember how much I'd rather have a dog than eat junk.

Sad that my own health and being thin are not good enough inspirations.  I just have  hard time looking in the mirror and picturing it and when I hit a roadblock it's so discouraging.

What do you guys do?

On that note, I leave you with Mr. Wiggles:

30 days until Disney...and I haven't even made it to 212 yet!

And I wanted to be 207.  As of todays weight of 217....that's ten more pounds in 30 days.  I'm getting an elliptical but I don't know when I'll get it so I can't bank on that for exercise and I've been kinda tired with work too.  I'm sore and not sleeping well.  I know if I exercise I'd feel better but it wasn't helping me lose weight even with a restricted diet so I gave up and have been eating BAD this week.  Like any sort of craving for fast food I have indulged.

Which is why I'm at 217 today.  Ugh!

Drowning in a sea of bad food....

I have been horribly bad the past few days.  I can't seem to get a grip and now that I'm working and have my own money it's been very difficult.  It's easy to eat right when you can't go buy fast food during the day!

I'm getting a good amount of money back on my taxes so I'm going to be an elliptical.  I've for some reason abandoned my workout routine which is a shame because I was feeling the difference in my everyday activities in a good way.

But the weight wasn't coming off and it was very discouraging to work hard and see NO results and it felt like I wasn't doing enough but I couldn't figure out what to do to make a change.  So I am hoping the elliptical will change that.  I do better when I exercise but I can't get myself to do it.

I'll figure it out.

Plateau....plateau....

So I'm stuck at around 215.  It waivers.  And when I get upset about not losing more weight Nick just says "weightloss isn't easy and there are lots of plateaus..."  After every 5 pounds though!?!?!?  Seriously???  I don't feel like I'm doing enough and since Grandma died I'm back to eating more junk.  I was doing so good.  But my willpower has faded.  You would THINK that with grandma dying because of health related issues caused by her weight I'd be super motivated.  But it's not motivating.

But I have lost 17 pounds since January 1st.  I should be proud of myself.  Why am I not proud of myself?

Help, My Scale is Lying to Me!

As in, depending on where it is on my bathroom floor I weigh something different.  Anywhere between 214.6 to 215.6.  I typically try to line it up in the same space every day but it gave me two different readings in that spot so who knows.  And the last few times it said 215 so I'll accept that.

We ate dinner out TWICE this weekend.  Once at a Pizza Ranch Buffet so you know how that goes.  And we got Culvers ice cream last night.  So I'm not doing too hot.  And since I had gotten sick I haven't exercised on a daily basis like I had before.  So today I'm staring...bah bah bah...30 Day Shred!  I will probably only ever be able to do Level One, if that, but we'll see how it goes.  In 30 days, maybe I'll see a difference.  I've read I should measure myself but I'm not very good at doing that in the same spot every time so I'm not going to.

And one thing to remember... MUSCLE WEIGHS MORE THAN FAT!  So if I gain I can't get to hard on myself unless it's from eating poorly like I did this weekend.

Getting back on track...

Yesterday was the first day since Grandma had her stroke that I hadn't cried.  It was a good feeling because you realize you really are capable of moving on after such a thing.

I also got back to eating healthy and Nick and I have been taking walks after dinner.

I am down to 214.4!  So just two more pounds until I take new photos.  Hopefully there will be some difference in the ten pounds I've lost.  If not, then I wonder if it was all water weight????

We go to Disney World in 46 days!  I'm hoping I slim down quite a bit by then.  I'd like to be at 200.  I felt pretty good when I got down to 204 which was the smallest I had been in a long time over a year ago, but as a reminder, I wasn't eating because I was broke and trying to pay bills first.

I've been eating cheerios for breakfast to get in fiber and help lower what I assume is high cholesterol.  I mean, I'm overweight.  I've been eating junk since I was little.  I am sure it's high.  And until I can go to the doctor, I will assume the worst.  My blood pressure is normal though.  Thank God because high blood pressure is what caused Grandmas stroke.

Does anyone even read this????

Sadness...

Sadly, my grandmother passed away on Wed.  Her funeral was Saturday.  I am still trying to deal and am in half-denial.  I spent days in the hospital with her, and yet it doesn't seem real.

Needless to say my diet and exercise has been thrown terribly off, but if for any reason I get back on track, it is so that I avoid the health problems she had.

God give me the strength.

Reasons

My grandmother is 70.  She has diabetes, had a triple bypass last year, and I just got called saying she has had a stroke with bleeding on the brain.

It has put into view my reasons for wanting to lose weight.  Healthy has always been good but mostly I wanted to be skinny.  It's true.

This changes everything.

OMG I'm STILL SICK!

I have almost completely lost my voice now.  I'm at 217 even though I had a few days of bad eating (A friend bought me lunch at Red Robin and then Nick got us Chinese food that night!) and I still haven't been able to work out.  It's starting to get annoying because I expected to see more progress at this point but I can't have progress if I'm sick and not able to be active.  And it's so beautiful outside!  Well, it's raining today but it has been warm.

Hoping for a change in my voice soon because a place called me for an interview and I can barely talk.  I have to yell to be heard at a whisper.  SO ANNOYING.  And I had to leave a message when they called back so I hope they can hear it!  I need work!