Day Two of Challenge Week: Meat Free!!!

For some reason I decided this week (on Sunday) that I wanted to try going "meat free".  No reason in particular, I love meat, but when I do eat it, I make poor choices of how it's prepared.  You know, like fried.

Day One did not go so well.  I didn't eat meat, but I used it as an excuse to eat a lot of sugar and junk and ended up with a pretty bad stomach ache.

Today went better.  I went grocery shopping and bought fruit for snacks and came up with some interesting dinner plans (homemade bean burritos anyone?).  So I've ate better.

That said, it's been awhile since I've written an entry and a lot of that is that we've moved states, had a lot of other changes going on too.

Yes I did get down to 198.  But I'm back up to about 212.  So, I'm really trying to continue to plug through, eat better, and learn to be healthy.  A year down and I haven't gotten too far, but at least I'm farther ahead than I was last year!

I feel like a failure!

I should be happy.  I'm engaged much sooner than I thought.  But I'm not happy.  Not with myself anyway.

I had two weeks of bad eating and went from 202.4 to 211.  I'm back down to 207.6 but if I had just stuck with the damn diet, and let's face it that IS what it is because I am not eating what I want to, I would be under 200 pounds.  Which meant so much to me!

Instead on Saturday when we get our engagement photos done I will still be a fat cow.

I'm on Myfitnesspal, and there is a girl on there that has lost 37 pounds in 4 months.  37 in FOUR MONTHS!  I can't even lose 30 in 7 MONTHS!  And so many people have great weightloss like that.  But I just can't stick to eating healthy.  It gets old, it gets boring.  I like cake.   I LOVE McDonalds.  We like to go out to eat.  It's EASY to go out to eat.

I'm so tired of trying so hard most of the time, only to let myself down.  What sort of psychological crap is going on that makes me love food so much?  And all of the BAD food.  And how come some people who aren't active can eat and eat and eat, and never gain an ounce, but I exercise and watch and it takes so much CONTROL to lose just a few pounds?

I'm going to hate my engagement photos, because they will always be a reminder of what I couldn't accomplish....

When you can't sleep, get productive!

I woke up at 3 am today.  I went pee, then went back to bed...and laid there.  For an hour.  So I got up. I had not intended to workout today as I wasn't going to have time. I work from 9-12, and then around 2:30 Nick's parents and sister will arrive, and around 5 we're going out to dinner with some of my family as well, and then coming back to have drinks.

But I was bad last night, and didn't cook, and when I went to go pee I saw that my nails, which I had so carefully painted, had not cured when I went to bed and had those lovely little fabric lines in them.  Ladies, you know what I'm talking about.  So, I drank some Chocolate Silk (I love that stuff surprisingly!) took the nail polish off, and worked out.  The hardest I ever have.

Not only did I set the resistance and the highest I've gone (not for the whole time I up and down it), but I went 3.5 miles all at once, and in only 65 mins.  The first time I worked out for an hour I went one mile.  In one month I have vastly improved and I am feeling good.  I also burned the most calories I ever have in a day.  I'm very impressed with myself.

And that folks, is why you stick with it, you DO improve, but it's gradual.  But in just one month you see drastic changes in your fitness level, and the more fit, the more muscle, and muscle burns calories more efficiently thus less fat.  So STICK WITH IT, and when you can't sleep, get productive!

~Shannah

I'm engaged! AND lost more weight! Happy Day!

Nick proposed last night!  It was unexpected, in a lovely manner, and I cried.  And told him I loved him a billion times but I'm not sure if I ever really said yes!  Lol!

And, to top off that great news, I got on the scale and was down to 206.4!  Since I weighed 210.6 last Monday, I know my calorie counting and workout effort is working!  That's 4.2 pounds in a week and a half!  Not even!  More than I want to be honest because I want my skin to stay tight, but on the other hand it means I'm back to being as close to under 200 as I thought I was before I bought the new, more accurate scale.  I bought a cute maxi dress at wal-mart today to wear out Saturday for our engagement dinner with both sides of the family!  It was 16 and I don't feel like a wale in it.  Lovely!

Thanks everyone and I hope your week is as good as mine is!

~Shannah

Changing The Plan

So, by Wed of last week after not losing any more weight, I decided to start tracking calories too.  And by Thursday I was just tracking calories.  As a result, as of this morning, I lost 2.2 pounds last week!  So, calorie counting it is.  Number one this is tried and true, and number two Myfitnesspal.com allows me to track food just as easily as Weight Watchers, and it still holds me accountable as it shows me when I go under/over/right on my calorie goal.  It also tracks exercise and you can tailor it all to your needs.  It also counts my fat, protien, and carbs, just like WW did.  Only I can see how much of all that I'm eating and what changes I should make!

So, we'll see how well this works.  I think it's the best method just because it's teaching me how much to eat and of what.  It's also opened up more options to me, while closing the doors on some other, poorer options in the sense that I feel some foods just aren't worth it.

Also, I've been on the elliptical like crazy!  I upped my resistance and am improving my time and distance quite a bit.  Which ALSO burns more calroies!  I bought a heart rate monitor today to more accurately track that.  But the calorie counter is weird and attached to the pedometer so we'll see how it goes???

Can you do it today?

A few days ago I read an inspirational blog from someone who had lost an incredible amount of weight.  She had been afraid she wouldn't make it, didn't know if she could live without all of the food she loves ever again, and I feel much the same way.

However, something she asked herself, which I think we should all ask ourselves, is "But can we do just today?"  Can you go without that McDonalds today?  YES!  Can you eat just one dessert today?  YES!  Can you drink more water today?  YES!

And this, my friends, makes the journey MUCH easier.  Look at just today, and things will be different tomorrow.  :)

Making More Changes

So, my WW weigh in was today, since on Friday I was 206 and I have worked out and ate within points I was really surprised to see it at 207.2.  And very upset.   I've also worked out the past three days.

So, I decided that I MUST not be doing something right.

Number One: I've been eating high point dinners. This may be effecting it.  Also had a bit of sodium in there.  So I'm going to try and balance my points throughout the day.

Number two: No more guessing points!  As in, guessing that's 1/4 pound burger and not weighing it, so I bought a food scale.  And realized I have been guessing a bit.

Number three: I will eat all my points!  I have been weighing myself every day, and if I don't lose, I don't eat all my points the next day.  After reading a few blogs, and remembering my sister said you need to use them all to lose, I am going to eat them all.

Number four:  I bought a new scale that also calculates BMI and Body Fat%.  That way, if I'm gaining muscle from workouts, I will know.

Number Five: Weigh myself ONCE A WEEK.  I have been weighing myself daily to hold myself accountable, but I don't hold myself accountable.  Last week I ate McDonalds twice in one day and at Applebee's the next.  Granted I was within points the Applebee's day and manage to somehow not have McDonalds effect my weight, it's not good food.  It's bad food.  Very bad food.

Here is my problem with buying a new scale, it says I'm 210.  Not 207.2.  So I can't imagine I'll have a good WI next week.  It will say I have gained weight.  This is not going to be good for my self esteem.  I was so excited to get o 206, to have lost 26 pounds, 8% of my bodyweight, etc.  And to have that ripped from you SUCKS.  So, now I have to go on that journey all over again.

I still want to be 192 by September 8.  I am hoping I can get there.  That's 11.5 weeks.  That's 1.5 pounds a week.  It'd be nice to do more.  Now that I am exercising more maybe that's what I need.  I was on the elliptical for 2 miles today.  Took forever because I'm slow but that's about 400 calories according to the elliptical (it said it was more but I don't quite trust it 100%)

I will get there!

It's been about a month since Disney and I haven't really gotten any farther in my journey.  I didn't realize that vacation would set me back a whole moth, but it pretty much has.  It was a lot harder to get back into the good eating habit than I thought and in fact this past Friday I actually finished unpacking.  I've been lazy.

I did get my elliptical about a week and a half ago and have been very good about using it.  My work schedule makes it a little difficult (10-6 is a horrible shift to try and get anything done ever), but today I stayed on it for a whole hour.  It was very slow going, I only went 1.5 miles.  Which is sad that my half mile takes 20 minutes of my time but that's the truth!

I also have to say that Fat Free Cool whip is a godsend!  It's 0 points for 2 tbsp and if you go over it's not that many points.  I put it on some strawberries and bananas and it makes for a very delicious treat.  If only fruit lasted longer!  I tend to gobble it up!

I'm slacking I know...

So Disney World was awesome, the weight gain from it, not so much, and then a week later there was Memorial Day Weekend.  Nick and I haven't really gone grocery shopping since before Disney so I'm totally off track on Weight Watchers.  I did manage to get back down to before Disney weight (208), but after the past few days it's gone up to 211. Nick's birthday.  He doesn't realize eating out at wherever he wants doesn't work for me or my diet, but I didn't fight it that much and indulged.  I think once in a while I have to take a few and revert to the old ways.  It reminds me that I give myself heartburn and tummy aches.  Lol.

My dad finally got my elliptical here, but forgot the adapter, so we had to go buy a universal one, and I've done a half mile today and yesterday.  It took 17 minutes for me to do a half mile and I was dripping sweat.  Out of shape much?  Yeah.  And totally more intense than walking.  So no I have no excuses to not push myself.  YAY!  I wanted to be to my goal weight by the end of the year, not sure if that will happen.  I want to be at 192 by September 8.  Nick and I are going to a Cardinals game (his birthday present from me), and I would like to have lost all that.  That's just over five pounds a month.  It IS doable, but can I do it?

Spray tan...not so bad.

I wanted a spray tan for vacation because my legs reflect light, they really do.  I looked it up online and that is good and bad, there are some real horror stories out there!  Anyway, here are the results.  Up close I freak out, because I have NEVER been tan, but in pictures, which is what I wanted it for, it doesn't look too bad!

10% gone!!!!!

I was 209 at my weight watchers weigh in yesterday which was only .2 pounds from my 10% goal so I weighed myself this morning and I was 208.6!!!  So I have officially lost 10% of my body weight!

I consider this a huge goal, because losing 10% of your body weight can lower cholesterol, lower blood pressure, decrease change of diabetes, and improve many other aspects of your health.

Not only that, but I'm only 1.6 pounds away from my 207 goal for Disney and I have no doubt I will do that by the end of the week.  I am also excited to see if Nick's family notices my 25 pound weight loss.  Will it make a difference???  I know it does in my face, I barely have a double chin now when I smile!  Woooo!  But the rest of my body it's questionable.  I've been taking measurements and I have lost some around my hips, waist, and bust, but I find my arms and thighs hard to measure in the same place so I don't have a change there but I'm not sure if that's accurate or not.

Success!!!

Had my weigh in, down to 209.  I checked the scale twice.  I about had a heart attack.  I was hoping for 210 something but 209!!!!  Not eating wings from Buffalo Wild Wings last night was the right choice for me!!!   No problem I will be 207 by Disney.  I have a week to lose two pounds.  If I keep this will power I will see under 200 in no time!   Well....vacation may interrupt it but we'll see!

Update

Down to 211.2.   My Weight Watchers weigh in is tomorrow though so hopefully I can get down to the 210 range by then.  That gives me one week to lose 3 pounds before vacation to meet my goal of 207.  I know I can do it, because if I get down to 210 that means I lost three pounds this week and I even struggled mid-week after eating pizza.

I went shopping the other night for vacation clothes and that was difficult.  Shirts usually aren't too bad for me, but I went to four different stores (Kohls, Gordmans, Dress Barn, Old Navy) and didn't find anything.  Some of that was due to a trend in crappy thin fabric, some size, and lastly, giant armholes in tank tops.  I didn't want to have to heavily alter a tank top that was $20 you know?  I had already been to Wal-Mart, Target, and Maurices but hadn't found anything either.

Last night I made a trip to Wal-Mart and saw that there was a Cato by it.  I had forgotten about this store and they have a half hour until close but I thought I'd try it.  Found two shirts, tried on a few more that I could have done but one had ruffles and rhinestones and the other had clear sequins and Nick doesn't like fussy fashion so I opted out because I thought I might feel silly.  I did have to fix the armholes on one of them but it was very simple and quick so no biggie.

Anyway, I can't wait to show you guys pictures from the trip and it shouldn't be too long that I'm showing you pics of 202!  Well, I might gain in Disney but I'm not going to follow WW while I'm there.  It's vacation.  You shouldn't worry about that stuff on Vacation.

212!!!!

So, another good day of eating and I made it!  212!  Just five more pounds to my goal for Disney and if I behave I know it will happen!  I personally don't see too much of a difference from 222 to 212 by my clothes do fit better and my measurements have gone down.  Well the ones that I've been able to log!  Lol.

222 on the left, 212 on the right 

Again, 222 on Left, 212 on right.

Like I said, physically it's hard to see a difference, I tried taking the pictures at the same angle and whatnot but I clearly didn't do a great job!  Lol.

Anyway, see you again at 202!!!!

I did it!!!!

So, I'm finally past 214.2  Which is what the scale said ALL weekend.  Yesterday I was a little more strict on myself so it finally moved down!  I didn't eat any of the weekly points (which seem to be more to maintain weight) and I saved a few of my daily points.  And the scale said....212.8 this morning!!!!!  Woooooo!!!

I'm not going to post any new pictures today, because it's not quite 20 pounds lost yet, so I'll hopefully get to take those tomorrow.  If I'm at 212.2 or something I'll still do them.  So look for those tomorrow!

I can't wait to see where I'll be at in two weeks when we go to Disney World if I stay on track.  207 here I come!  I think I can do it!

Oh, and the other day I made a yummy cake using a spice cake mix, a 15 oz can of pumpkin, 1/2 a  cup water, and two eggs.  Put in a 13x9 pan and cut into 15 pieces it's only 3 points a piece.  I did add some cream cheese frosting which is horrible (not tasting-wise though!) and makes it about a 7 point treat but sometimes it's worth it if I still stay within points.

Someone also told me that if you add pumpkin to just a chocolate mix and no water or anything it tastes like brownies so that's on the list next!

Time to start exercising!

The first few days of Weight Watchers I always loose like crazy, well, today I was down .2 pounds.  So, while I'm not complaining that I'm back to 214.2, I need to do some more to start losing faster before Disney!  7 pounds to go before my goal and 19 days to do it!  It CAN and will happen!

Plus, my hip/piriformis muscle is really starting to bother me again and quite honestly walking and stretches are what makes it go away, so no point in living in pain right?

It's not worth being miserable every day, just for five seconds of taste!

And that is what I have decided.  Weight Watchers is going very well.  I am back down to 214.4. Yes I am on the scale every day but that is for a confidence boost and to assure I'm doing things to help myself to the best I can.

I'm eating breakfast every day, and drinking 64 oz of water.  I am also eating all the points I'm supposed to but I am tracking everything very closely.  No guessing "about how many points".

I have ate at Outback and enjoyed it, and I even at Taco Johns yesterday.  Did I eat two softshells and a large ole?  No.  I had one softshell and a small potato ole. And I took small bites and actually enjoyed it.

And tomorrow when I step on the scale, I will be down again.  Because I can do this, because I want to do this, and because food is not more important than how I feel about how I look!

It certainly does work.

My first week of weight watchers I'm always surprised at how quickly the weight falls off.  I started back up at 218.8 and am down to 215.4 after three days.  I know it won't continue to stay this way but it's a relief to at least see weight starting to fall off and not pack on.  I'm hoping to get down to 212 soon so I can take some new pictures.  I don't think there will be much of a change in how my body looks just yet, but I want to take pictures for every 10 pounds lost because I saw someone else do it and when you you start getting skinny it's awesome to see how much 10 pounds makes a difference.

Anyway, so happy that it's dropping off, wondering when that will stop a little, and hoping I don't hit any bumps too soon!  207 before Disney here I come!  (Why I picked 207 I don't know.  I wanted to be under 200 but felt that was unreachable in two months when we realized we were going to Disney.  With WW in 20 days it might not be so unobtainable but I don't want to fail and small goals are good.

Success!

After two days on Weight Watchers I have already lost 2.6 pounds!  The plus side to this is that I even ate at Outback (I checked points of everything first), and was never hungry!

I drank lots of water, and ate all my points, so I wasn't starving myself.  I don't know how WW does it, but it does!  C'mon Disney!  I'm getting ready!  21 more days!

Back on Weight Watchers....

After admitting my major fail, and then stepping on the scale to see I had gained almost two more pounds....I joined weight watchers again.  I know it works.  I know it's hard to stick to for myself, but I know it works.  And it typically works pretty fast for me I just can't go past two weeks.  I know it'll be a struggle, but I work now so I can buy food I need, and Mr. Wiggles (my future Pugs name) is total motivation.

Wish me luck.  I started yesterday so we'll see how it goes and I'll keep you updated!

Fessing Up

So this past week, I've done very bad.  I haven't done a thing to loose weight and I've done everything to gain.  I've ate fast food several days in a row, and yesterday ate it twice.  I go there telling myself all the way how horrible it is for me, but I can't stop myself.

So I told Nick.  And I cried. And he was supportive.  He told me he didn't know what to do to help me but he loved me very much and wanted a long life with me and didn't want that cut short.  And then a few minutes later said that if I get down to 182 (which is not my goal but 30 pounds)  he will buy me a pug.  That's right, he'll get me a dog.

So, I printed out this a few pug pictures, one on the fridge and one for the dashboard of my car, so I can remember how much I'd rather have a dog than eat junk.

Sad that my own health and being thin are not good enough inspirations.  I just have  hard time looking in the mirror and picturing it and when I hit a roadblock it's so discouraging.

What do you guys do?

On that note, I leave you with Mr. Wiggles:

30 days until Disney...and I haven't even made it to 212 yet!

And I wanted to be 207.  As of todays weight of 217....that's ten more pounds in 30 days.  I'm getting an elliptical but I don't know when I'll get it so I can't bank on that for exercise and I've been kinda tired with work too.  I'm sore and not sleeping well.  I know if I exercise I'd feel better but it wasn't helping me lose weight even with a restricted diet so I gave up and have been eating BAD this week.  Like any sort of craving for fast food I have indulged.

Which is why I'm at 217 today.  Ugh!

Drowning in a sea of bad food....

I have been horribly bad the past few days.  I can't seem to get a grip and now that I'm working and have my own money it's been very difficult.  It's easy to eat right when you can't go buy fast food during the day!

I'm getting a good amount of money back on my taxes so I'm going to be an elliptical.  I've for some reason abandoned my workout routine which is a shame because I was feeling the difference in my everyday activities in a good way.

But the weight wasn't coming off and it was very discouraging to work hard and see NO results and it felt like I wasn't doing enough but I couldn't figure out what to do to make a change.  So I am hoping the elliptical will change that.  I do better when I exercise but I can't get myself to do it.

I'll figure it out.

Plateau....plateau....

So I'm stuck at around 215.  It waivers.  And when I get upset about not losing more weight Nick just says "weightloss isn't easy and there are lots of plateaus..."  After every 5 pounds though!?!?!?  Seriously???  I don't feel like I'm doing enough and since Grandma died I'm back to eating more junk.  I was doing so good.  But my willpower has faded.  You would THINK that with grandma dying because of health related issues caused by her weight I'd be super motivated.  But it's not motivating.

But I have lost 17 pounds since January 1st.  I should be proud of myself.  Why am I not proud of myself?

Help, My Scale is Lying to Me!

As in, depending on where it is on my bathroom floor I weigh something different.  Anywhere between 214.6 to 215.6.  I typically try to line it up in the same space every day but it gave me two different readings in that spot so who knows.  And the last few times it said 215 so I'll accept that.

We ate dinner out TWICE this weekend.  Once at a Pizza Ranch Buffet so you know how that goes.  And we got Culvers ice cream last night.  So I'm not doing too hot.  And since I had gotten sick I haven't exercised on a daily basis like I had before.  So today I'm staring...bah bah bah...30 Day Shred!  I will probably only ever be able to do Level One, if that, but we'll see how it goes.  In 30 days, maybe I'll see a difference.  I've read I should measure myself but I'm not very good at doing that in the same spot every time so I'm not going to.

And one thing to remember... MUSCLE WEIGHS MORE THAN FAT!  So if I gain I can't get to hard on myself unless it's from eating poorly like I did this weekend.

Getting back on track...

Yesterday was the first day since Grandma had her stroke that I hadn't cried.  It was a good feeling because you realize you really are capable of moving on after such a thing.

I also got back to eating healthy and Nick and I have been taking walks after dinner.

I am down to 214.4!  So just two more pounds until I take new photos.  Hopefully there will be some difference in the ten pounds I've lost.  If not, then I wonder if it was all water weight????

We go to Disney World in 46 days!  I'm hoping I slim down quite a bit by then.  I'd like to be at 200.  I felt pretty good when I got down to 204 which was the smallest I had been in a long time over a year ago, but as a reminder, I wasn't eating because I was broke and trying to pay bills first.

I've been eating cheerios for breakfast to get in fiber and help lower what I assume is high cholesterol.  I mean, I'm overweight.  I've been eating junk since I was little.  I am sure it's high.  And until I can go to the doctor, I will assume the worst.  My blood pressure is normal though.  Thank God because high blood pressure is what caused Grandmas stroke.

Does anyone even read this????

Sadness...

Sadly, my grandmother passed away on Wed.  Her funeral was Saturday.  I am still trying to deal and am in half-denial.  I spent days in the hospital with her, and yet it doesn't seem real.

Needless to say my diet and exercise has been thrown terribly off, but if for any reason I get back on track, it is so that I avoid the health problems she had.

God give me the strength.

Reasons

My grandmother is 70.  She has diabetes, had a triple bypass last year, and I just got called saying she has had a stroke with bleeding on the brain.

It has put into view my reasons for wanting to lose weight.  Healthy has always been good but mostly I wanted to be skinny.  It's true.

This changes everything.

OMG I'm STILL SICK!

I have almost completely lost my voice now.  I'm at 217 even though I had a few days of bad eating (A friend bought me lunch at Red Robin and then Nick got us Chinese food that night!) and I still haven't been able to work out.  It's starting to get annoying because I expected to see more progress at this point but I can't have progress if I'm sick and not able to be active.  And it's so beautiful outside!  Well, it's raining today but it has been warm.

Hoping for a change in my voice soon because a place called me for an interview and I can barely talk.  I have to yell to be heard at a whisper.  SO ANNOYING.  And I had to leave a message when they called back so I hope they can hear it!  I need work!

Stuffy nose...ugh!

Well, so far the Phillips Colon health is working.  Three days in a row.  Let me clarify it is NOT a colon cleanse. I don't feel those are healthy.  It's probiotics (bacteria) that help naturally regulate your movements.

I didn't eat well yesterday, but I still managed to maintain weight.  I have to admit I'm a little obsessed with the scale which I have long said is NOT healthy but I know how easy it is for me to stop keeping track, and I also want to see how the food I eat is effecting my weight.  Kind of like a scientific study.  Because I'm thinking my metabolism is really slow.

I am so ready to start exercising, well walking, again.  I'm bored of sitting around on the laptop and watching TV.  I'm hoping I get that job.  But there are still a few more steps to the process so we'll see.  It'll mean working weekends but I guess that's something I'll have to compromise for a while.

Go away sickness!

So no workout today, I'm still feeling crappy.  I knew this would happen!  I also indulged in some frozen waffles because I didn't eat very many calories yesterday and that of course made my stomach queasy.  So no more waffles for me.

I'm chilling on the couch watching The Revolution today and they just stated that studies show people who skip breakfast every morning gain one pound of fat a month!  Ugh!  That's 12 pounds a year!  So I'm glad I've started eating breakfast and watching everything else I eat.

I've cut out soda of all kind, even diet, and no fast food.  So there are two big bad for you things that I've cut out.

Can't wait until I feel up to walking again.  I hate having to rest.  It's boring.

Sickness go away....but yay!

I'm down to 218.  Even.  I had to weigh myself several times to be sure.  That means I'm only two pounds heavier than when I met Nick. Which, while not my ideal weight, is awesome, and it's also my 5% mark according to WW.

I took my first Colon Health pill yesterday and actually had a nice easy bowel movement this morning when I woke up.  Even though most people said it takes a week to start working I'm happy.  Let's see if it continues.

On the downside, my throat is really sore.  I have an interview tomorrow and I don't want to overdo anything today so I'm thinking since after I wrote that post yesterday I got bored and walked another hour, I will probably take it easy.  Which sucks when I got such good results from eating pretty decent and working out yesterday.

Oh...and Nick is FOR SURE taking me to Disney World!  I've never been and I am SO excited.  But I do need to continue walking to get stamina up for all the walking we'll be doing.  A little over two months!  And I'd like to be a bit thinner by then.  I bought all sorts of really good for you food.  Apples, oranges, celery, peas, eggs.  And plan on sticking to that for breakfast lunch, etc.  Oh and peanut butter.  Peanut butter is my extra.  It's all natural kind (Skippy's all natural has all the same nutritional info as regular but the ingredients are different) so I'm okay allowing myself a bit of it.  Protein.

That's enough for now.  I'm pretty sure nobody reads this anyway.

Into Mordor and Onward with Exercise!

I've been keeping up with my walking and have even started my workouts with the yoga DVD or today I did a dance video (glad nobody is here to watch because I do less dancing and more flailing).  And I even walked an hour and ten minutes today!  Woooo!

I feel accomplished but I wish I could get my weight to drop off faster.  I'm not eating perfect, last night I made sugar cookies, but I'm not eating like I was (can we say McDonalds two times a week?).  One of my main concerns is that perhaps my digestive system isn't helping me out.  I wouldn't normally talk about bowel movements but I do think it's important to good health.  I go about once a week.  Maybe twice if I'm lucky, and it's rarely very much.  So WHERE is all that food going?  Today I'm going grocery shopping and I plan on picking up that Phillips Colon Health.  I've done some reading, it is not a colon cleanse, and it usually starts working after a week, but I figure one week is ok by me if it helps me digest my food like I need to be doing.  FYI fiber has not helped.  I'll keep everyone updated on how it's working.

Until then, keep positive, any exercise is better than NO exercise, and it my stamina is getting better, even if I'm not losing weight!

The Past Two Days...

Yesterday I quit my new job.  It was awful and wasn't the right fit for me as I see myself as a massage therapist.  So I got home and I couldn't sit.  I was pretty upset.  I know I put a lot of pressure on Nick financially since I don't have a job and it really bothers me.

I took it as an opportunity to exercise.  I was going to walk for 40 minutes again, and I put in The Lion King.  I walked for an hour.  I just didn't feel like stopping so I didn't.  I also did 50 stability ball push-ups! I must have had adrenaline going because today I only walked 30 minutes and didn't do many reps, but at least I got off my butt.  Today I watched Shrek.

I'm thinking I might watch Pirates of the Caribbean tomorrow.  It's a good way to keep my attention going.

I ate ok today.  I had a small salad and some corn for lunch.  We had subway for dinner.  I ate 2 lemon girl scout cookies.  One homemade cookie that I didn't enjoy (they need to be thrown out), and I actually think that's it.  I need to start eating breakfast.

Speaking of which...I read today that if you eat breakfast before you work out you will burn more fat because your metabolism is already going.  So that's the tip for the day: Eat breakfast before your workout!

Jealousy gets ya down on a bad day....

Yesterday I had a job interview for a massage position at a salon & spa.  I was offered the job on the spot and since I haven't worked since before school I accepted it.  I had my first day of training and it's so different from the mentality that I was taught at school that it was a particularly brutal day and I'm wondering if it's the right place for me even.

Then I get home, and Nick's ex, who friended me on Facebook (they do have a 2 year old together), has posted a before and after picture of herself.  40 pounds lost and 3 dress sizes.  And that's her halfway mark!  So you'd think she'd be pretty big but she is in fact not.  I'd say 20 pounds more not 40 or she'll look grossly thin...

Anyway!  So yeah, giant jealousy and Nick's sister liked the post and sometimes I feel like his family likes her more than they'll ever like me.  I know that's not the case, but...I compare myself to her, and I think she's prettier, and funnier, etc.  Not to mention she had a child with Nick and I want a baby so bad but he's all for "getting established" and I'd like to be married first as a personal preference, and I have three years on him so my clock is ticking a bit faster.

It's rough.  Most of the time before/after photos are inspiring but today, it made me feel horrible and just gigantic because I'm pretty sure she was never as big as I am.

So today, no advice, no uplifting.  Just me hitting a brick like we all do.

Workout with Disney!

Last week I started using a stability ball and weights, and bought a Jilian Michaels Yoga Meltdown DVD because dieting wasn't cutting it.  I love the DVD but I can't do a lot of it because I have no upper body strength and cannot hold all 222 pounds of myself up.

So I was lying in bed trying to think about how to get more cardio in.  We live in a a condo and it's got an open floor plan and I read somewhere that walking is just as successful as running so I thought I could walk inside.  It's WAY too cold for my bones out in that weather and honestly, I had the idea of someone peeking out their window seeing me exercising.

So, I put in my favorite Disney move, Beauty and the Beast, and decided I would walk for 40 minutes this morning!  I chose Beauty and the Beast because I know it well, and wouldn't get distracted.  Yes, I admit, walking around in circles was boring, but it worked.  I got 40 minutes of a brisk walk in.  Better than 14 minutes of attempted yoga melt.  Hopefully after a few weeks of weight training I can try the yoga again, but we'll see.

Have a good day and don't loose hope!

My Goal for this Blog

My first post was rambling and I apologize for that.  It was a bad introduction and I'd like to introduce what I'd like this blog to be about.

I'm trying to get healthy, and I want you to get healthy too.  I plan on posting about my journey, and giving you tips to go on yours.  I also want you to know the effects extra weight can have on the body that people may not know.  We all know belly fat is dangerous, drinking lots of water (The massage therapist in me wants you to know that 1/2 your body weight in ounces is recommended daily!) and eating the right foods and portions is key.    

But did you know that for every extra pound you carry it adds an extra 3 pounds of pressure on your knee joint when you walk, and 10 extra pounds of pressure when you run?  That means, for me, I put an extra 186 pounds of pressure on my knees when I walk (As I weigh 222, am 5'8", and 160 is ideal goal for my height).  That's kind of scary!

I'll leave you with that thought, and I'll see you tomorrow!

~Shannah

My name is Shannah, and I'm a Chubby Chick.

The first time I was called fat was in 5th grade.  I in fact was not fat, but taller than most of the girls and not as skinny little kid like anymore but that's when it happened.  Nobody ever called me fat after that except myself.

So now, at 26, I am 5'8" and 222.8 pounds.  Yes the .8 IS necessary.  I am not the biggest I ever was, that was 242, but last year I was down to 204 after the Poor Girls Diet.

So I'm trying again.  I got back up to 233 and went on weight watchers.  I've been a bit stagnant for a few weeks now.  I just finished massage therapy school and am currently jobless so I thought "No excuse not to workout!" so I got weights, a yoga mat (I live in an upstairs condo and I'm pretty sure Mrs. Neighbor Downstairs does NOT want to hear all 222.8 pounds of me jumping up and down doing a cardoi DVD), and a stability ball.  I started last week, no weightloss or gain so I guess that's good.

I'm on WW.  I've tried counting calories. I can't stick to either.  I don't like having to track my food.  I KNOW, I KNOW, that's supposed to be a very successful method, but it feels like I'm in prison and that is not a successful feeling.

What I hate the most, is my face isn't very round, yes I have a double chin if I smile right, but I have "little head syndrome"  I feel as if my head is little and my body is big.  Like a cartoon.  Like it doesn't belong on my body, which it doesn't because my body doesn't belong on me!

I want to get healthy.  Diabetes and high blood pressure run in the family, and as a massage therapist I know all the bad things extra weight does to your body.  And of course I want to be thin and go into a normal store and buy something off the rack!  DUH!  I'm a girl.  We think that way even if we try to deny it.